Relationships are a primary focus of ACIM. There are countless aspects of relationships that relate to our forgiveness classroom – i.e. ALL of them! Even if one focuses on just interpersonal relationships there are plenty of them!
ACIM is always and only about content of the mind, never about behavior or form. Without that foundation, we get hopelessly lost in ego’s propaganda machine: space-time-persona identification. As Ken Wapnick says, we can never get too far from the non-dual metaphysics of the Course.
Here are just a few topics about relationships
- Relationships exist in mind
- Any relationship includes all relationships
- There are only 2 relationships …
- … Our relationship with ego is a dysfunctional fantasy
- … Our relationship with Holy Spirit a.k.a. our IKT (Inner Kindness Teacher) restores the peace of Oneness …
- We don’t understand Oneness, so HS uses sameness (shared interests)
- We can afford to be kind to everyone …
- … and everything …
- … but only from above the battleground of duality …
- and we return from duality when we …
- forgive our decision-making minds … by the 3 R’s … or maybe 4 R’s within this context? 🙂
- REVEAL our ego investment: catch that aspect of mind in the act of condemning
- RELEASE our mind’s grip on that identity investment: see that it’s not working
- REPLACE: allow IKT to replace ego’s anxiety/fear/anger/desolation with peace
- RELATE: to everything differently, because we are related in Spirit to all as Self
” … ‘(3:4) We have covered the illusion of time already, but the illusion of levels of teaching seems to be something different.’ We really think there is a difference between our important and unimportant relationships, concept the ego loves, for it reinforces the notion of a hierarchy of illusions–its first law of chaos (T-23.II.2-3). …” – #KennethWapnick, #JourneyThroughTheManual of #ACourseInMiracles, p. 24
There are only 2 relationships:
Our (healing, helpful) relationship to our Inner Kindness Teacher (a.k.a. Holy Spirit)
our (imaginary, dysfunctional) relationship to ego:
the maladaptive solution to the non-existent problem
All our OTHER SEEMINGLY external relationships are simply reflections of the two:
extensions of our (healing) relationship to our Inner Kindness Teacher
projections of our (dysfunctional) relationship to ego.
We tend to focus on our relationships with other people; we tend to be species snobs with respect to humans, but our relationships with anything and everything, anyone and everyone – in the service of our Inner Kindness Teacher – can be a mirroring mechanism to return us to the mind.
These relationships all can … and must … be healed by inclusive, generalized learning using the very same specifics ego intended as magic to keep separate, which now HS uses as miracles to restore wholeness.
Ego’s purpose is to keep us in the dream of separation by fixating beyond mere impartial preferences between illusions that are equal in truth … illusion A = illusion B, etc.
… to making a ‘big deal’ over differences. Our entire space-time culture is – by default – employed by ego to reinforce this zombie propaganda of unconscious sin-guilt-fear, but we can meet every one and everything with mercy and gratitude for their mirroring gifts (showing us the contents of our unconscious mind) instead of being ‘at the mercy of’ and therefore in contempt and condemnation of – at war with – everything that SEEMS to be outside us.
That profound difference in the “What is it for?” question that we ask of everyone … changes everything from prison to classroom.
Here are some examples of general categories of relationships that SEEM to be external; note which ones ‘press your buttons’ … which ones are your ‘sacred cows’ … and which ones might be dormant traps waiting for just the right time to pounce (from our own scripts) on ‘us’ … seemingly in response to someone else’s script … but we wrote every line of our life’s screenplay … just not necessarily on a conscious level.
RELATIONSHIP categories: as egos we WANT these problems to keep ourselves mindless; as we grow weary of this dysfunction, we begin to generalize and see each of these categories as a venue for mindful forgiveness of our belief in separation … we CHANGE THE PURPOSE OF EACH OF THESE RELATIONSHIPS from condemnation to healing … from magic (of differences) to miracle (of sameness):
Our own bodies / definition of ‘self’
Food / Water / Nutrition / “our definition” of What is or isn’t healthy /
diet / weight / self-image / addictions
Fatigue / Stamina / Vitality / Sleep / Fitness / health issues / pleasure
Exercise / Mobility / Cancer / Heart disease / rare illnesses
Age / Health / Disease / Medicine / Mortality / Death
Asceticism / Indulgence / Alcohol / Drugs (prescription/recreational)
Other bodies / definition of ‘other’
Family / Parents / Siblings / Relatives / Genetics / Heredity
Spouses / Sexuality (hetero/homo) / boundaries / fidelity
Friends / Enemies / Communities (physical/virtual)
Co-workers / Bosses / Employees
Cultural / Gender / Ethnic / Sexual Orientation / Political Biases / Party affiliation
Legal status / criminal record / taxes / sovereignty / corruption
Wars / Drones / Privacy / Terrorism / Bureaucracy /
Animals / Pets / Wildlife / Plants / Food resources / Extinction
Viruses / Bacteria / GMOs / Pesticides / Food additives / CO2 / Pollution
Minerals / “Inanimate objects”
Money / Exchange / Wealth / Poverty / Lack / Loss / Security / Retirement
Technology / Cell phones / Computers / Television / Radio / Texting
Software / Hardware / Pundits / Blogosphere / Media biases
Cars / Traffic / Airlines / Safety / Commuting / Boats / Skateboards
Housing / Poverty / Affluence / Stuff / Lifestyle / Comparisons / “real” estate
Clothing / Style / Fashion / Culture / Art / Music / Literature / Drama / Movies
Death Metal, Country Western, Classical, other genres
Weather / Ecology / Temperature / Climate
disasters / tornados / lightning / volcanos / earthquakes / tidal waves / loss
Dimensions / Quantum Physics
Atoms to Galaxies
Quarks to Quasars
Emptiness of Space
Schedules / Leisure / Work / Play / Boredom / Puritan ethic / holidays
our ‘personal’ stories / Family stories /
___ makes me feel ___
past events “sins” no one knows about
past events “sins” others know about and won’t forgive you
BE GENTLE with yourself if you notice a lot of these still push your buttons; these are all fair game for our forgiveness classroom. Each one of the many topics below could easily be expanded on in much greater detail.
(Note: This article was adapted from the original article of the same title on ACIMblog.com, and is an outline of a video recording on the topic of relationships. )